The Pizza of Feeding a Toddler

I assume all Mothers have the best of intentions; I know that I certainly do. As an older mom I have been allowed more time on the Earth to bear witness to many other Mothers, granting me the opportunity to formulate an infinite amount of opinions of how I would do things. So here I am in my middle years, knowing without a doubt what the best food options are for my toddler.

I made sure that we did not feed Beny solid foods too early, I wanted to ensure that her digestive system was healthily formed and practiced in the digestive process. When ready for solid foods I made sure that she was fed only single food items for a minimum of five days to minimize food allergies or at least bear witness to the cause of a food allergy. She didn’t have cows milk until she was 14 months old, no lactose intolerance for my little girl. I measured (even if most of the time it was mental calculations) the grams of protein vs. complex carbohydrates at each meal. Simple carbohydrates were kept at a minimum for the first fifteen months, and it was pretty limited to Cheerios and nutritious whole grain baby cereal.  I vowed I would never feed her fast food, french fries or any other unhealthy food item.

What I have to come to learn is that toddlers’ are a persnickety breed. Their favorite food choice changes daily, literally, and leftovers are not an option at least not for my little Peanut. 

Our Toddlers meal options are like a selection of various pizzas. There is the very healthy all veggie pizza made with whole grain flat bread (minimizing those nasty carbs). I actually do feed her only veggie meals, such as garbanzo beans with a mixed vegetable side, or a homemade (by Grammy) pinto bean soup with slices of fresh carrots – it’s healthy and she likes it. Of course there are the evil fat filled mouth-watering pepperoni pizzas with the melted cheese dripping over its side. Bad mother that I am she has had that for dinner also, because it was what we (the adults) are having and because it was easy. Of course, there are the middle of the road pizzas with minimal cheese, chicken, vegies and a side salad. That is more the norm in our household, but, we have to work at it to keep the meal balanced.

If life never got in the way, and if I were June Cleaver or Carol Brady (at least she had a housekeeper) I would grow my own vegetables, cook them with only healthy oils and fresh herbs, all while living in a preservative sugar-free household. But, sadly I am not, I am me; a Mother that loves to work, a Mother with other interests, a Mother that requires alone time or I get persnickety, a Mother that really does not enjoy housework. A Mother that knows better but doesn’t always do better because I have other things to do.

Basically, that is the crux of it, isn’t’ it? I want my daughters to grow up to be their own person, and not live up to any ideal standard of perceived perfection. I just want them to try and do the best they can. However, I want them to love endlessly, respect humanity and Mother Earth, respect themselves, honor the God or Goddess (as they choose) and know that no man is perfect on Earth. I want them to know that our imperfections are what make us all equally perfect.

© Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Theory: 3 Types of Mothers in the World

I have a theory.... there are 3 types of Mothers in the World.  The order of listing does not represent any inherent value to the type.

Type 1: The Glam Mom
This is the type of Mom that is always perfectly coifed, nails lacquered, wears high heels in spite of lugging around 25 pounds plus of a child, uses large cashmere scarfs to hide public breast feeding instead of drop cloths all the while managing to keep the scarf perfectly resting on her shoulders while not breast-feeding, only carries one medium size bag, preferably a Louis Vuitton (contingent upon the disposable income of course), the Glam is constant regardless of income, this type of woman can be glamorous on any income. The Glam Mom never home-schools, she doesn’t really care what anyone thinks of her mothering skills except the people close to her. She maintains a social/political event calendar that is impressive, she may work, but she always maintains the decorum of Glam regardless of the personal or professional situation. She is the Mom with the $2500 stroller if it can be afforded, regardless of income she has the best within her budget. Appearances are important, and she is successful at appearances. The Glam Mom makes mothering look easy and stress-free because her children behave in public, her children are always dressed nicely, appropriately and are clean. Wrinkles in her clothes and on her face are not part of her vocabulary, they simply don't exist because she said so. When I think of this woman, I see an orchid, strong, gentle and fragrant.

Type 2: The Sporty Mom
The Sporty Mom manages to find time to exercise at the gym, wears her little tight leggings or shorts, sports bra,  is make-up less, generally has short or cropped hair and is sufficiently organized that she accomplishes everything she sets out to do during her day.  Dirty dishes rarely sit in her sink. Sporty Mom is always at the kids sports event, cheering them on from the sidelines with just the appropriate amount of agression. She spends very little time on herself, her day is spent on household chores and caring for children, her children are always the priority. For a baby-day-out she only needs one bag, she is able to consolidate her personal and baby items into that one bag, she doesn’t need more bags because Murphy’s Rules never apply to her, babies don't have poop explosions requiring extra wipes, nor do the kids use Sharpies to decorate their clothes right before entering the Church.  This Mother loves to homeschool thinking no one can teach her children better than she. Her children are active little things focused on sports and their education, she is strict, she never has to ask her children if their homework is completed, for it always is. She strives to be Mother-of-the-Year, she loses herself in the family structure. A peace lily is what reminds me of this Mom, strong, simple elegance personified and unique in her own right.

Type 3: The Frazzled Mom

The Frazzled Mom is dressed appropriately in public (other than the grocery store), for social events and most in particular for work. At social events she would rather be over-dressed than under-dressed. She definitely has her public persona and her home persona; the two seldom intertwine. When actively parenting her hair is pulled back, she is in not so pretty sweats or jeans, baggy t-shirts and tackles the parenting job head on with a laser focus. She knows her children aren’t perfect, nor does she portray the falsehood of perfection to her community. Her life is not only about her children, husband and home. She has an individuality that she fights to maintain, and seeks time for herself. She wants her daughters to know an education is used as a stepping stone in the career ladder, she wants to be her children’s inspiration through her actions of individuality and not just Motherhood. This Mom is the girl scout of preparing for baby’s day out, it takes large bags, lots of them. She is multi-dimensional, fierce, and assertive like peonies, just keep peeling back those petals and you find there are always more layers to that personality.

Which one am I, hmmm let me see, of course the only option for me is the Frazzled Mom and by the way my daughter is better dressed than I am on a daily basis. I would most assuredly prefer to be a Glam Mom, but I can never keep one of those large scarfs in place, it would have to be stapled to my neck. Actually, I think most Moms fall into the Frazzled category merely by the virtue that life is hectic, and in todays world where Moms either want a career or have to work, there is not enough time in the day to be Glam.  On good days, I’m lucky I get my makeup on and hair blown out (it takes me a good 40 minutes to blow-dry my hair well). On the days that I am only ‘Momming’ my hair is usually wash and wear which means it gets nice and frizzy living in a 100% humidity I often look like the wicked witch – think of my hair as a pyramid in the hot desert though not so elegantly layered. My attire is alluring, ask the Husband. I have several at-home-outfits, varying from black yoga pants, to black sweats, to old baggy jeans. My tops are all the same style, $5 t-shirts from Academy in a variety of colors, namely spring and winter colors in two different sizes, baggy and really baggy from the mens-department for their length. Another differentiator of the t-shirts, is how stained they are, I do everything in these t-shirts, cook, bake, bathe baby, even sleep in them, yep, sexy all the way. Though the Good Husband never complains. For Christmas I asked Santa for more t-shirts, it was time to rotate the really stained ones into cleaning rags.

I would prefer to be the Glam Mom, truly I would, but, sadly it's not me.

I just know that one day Beny, will look me up and down rolling her eyes in the way that all 13 year olds have perfected while saying, “Did you see her Mom, wasn’t she dressed nice, she is so beautiful and YOUNG.” I don’t have the perfect response yet, but, I’m working on it.

Which type of Mom are you? Take the Poll.

© Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

An Older Moms Problem .... Boobies Traveling South

Boobies Traveling South (the title bears repeating)

Everyone knows that boobs, breasts, yayas, cha-cha’s travel south in the winter years for most women right? This is due to several factors, (I am not a scientist or doctor but I’m pretty sure I have the reasons correct) gravity, genetics, cup-size (small boobies don’t go so far south), age, weight, exercise, and presumably diet. Though the principle culprits are gravity, genetics and cup-size, which means it is basically out of my control.  As I have aged – a little, very little – the girls aren’t as perky as they usto be, my true north is starting to head to Mexico. Overall I was ok with this, a good sturdy steel bra to reengineer the girls to face Canada works well.

After a year of carrying an infant, now a pre-toddler and quickly moving towards a full toddler, weighing more at every stage, well, I think it can have a negative effect on an older Mom. I principally carry Beny on the left side, I occasionally try to carry her on the right to balance things out, but it doesn’t feel comfortable. So, the problem is that for a year, I have been carrying now 21 pounds on one side of my body, flattening out one of the girls. I’m pretty sure one of the girls is pointing, maybe hanging, towards Mexico, and the other is around Oklahoma.

Thank God for underwire bras – certainly designed by a Man, but if it works, I’ll take it.

What about older Dads, do they have these problems, if anything goes South on them it is hidden by a well placed zipper.

© Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.