Adoption Here We Come - Part 5

When I say I missed this child, I mean his absence, at the least the hope of his future as part of us left a hole in my heart. Every time I passed through the office/sitting room to get to our bedroom it’s emptiness was a reminder. So I told Husband I was unwilling to live with an empty room and quickly filled it as my office. Which it remains to this day.

What to do, do we continue to attempt to adopt, do we proceed as we are, do we look for random storks willing to drop a baby into our arms instead of proceeding to his true destination? Here’s the thing, Husband really wants a kid, he too hurt for the loss of this child, he too was disappointed and he too values the random pictures we come across sighing deeply and stating, “we would have been better for him”. Actually, we don’t know that for a fact, but it sure does feel good to believe it. We begin to scour the Earth once again for adoption options, some options are revisited though never the one from the state system – not because the state system is bad, I know of many people that have successfully adopted through the system, it just wasn’t for us, again, My age, my work. Have you ever been on the state system website with pictures of kids available for adoption? How does one choose? Yes, there are professional state workers that match the ‘right’ child to the ‘right parents’, I think they are incredibly successful and are doing God’s work on Earth, they are serving a population that is unable to serve themselves.

A family friend who lives in Mexico and performs volunteer work with the orphanages offers to assist; he is a friend with the Director of a large orphanage. Ok, this is a good fit, Mexico is our next-door neighbor, we are Mexican-American, lets find out what the options are. Well believe it or not, Mexico does not allow babies to be adopted out of the country. Ok, now I am pissed, with so many people from Mexico illegally and legally coming to the U.S. to make a better life for themselves, shop, entertainment, and live a life of safety versus random life-threatening violence (the rich moving to the U.S.) Obviously, the opportunity to live in the U.S. reaches across the social-economic hierarchy of Mexico.  This is not a political statement, I have no issue with people crossing the border legally, and believe we have to have some type of immigration restructure to minimize the illegal immigration, however, we also need to recognize the value in terms of dollars of how the illegal population supports the U.S. economy. Really? Mexico does not allow international adoptions? Ok, I am exaggerating a bit, Mexico does allow adoptions but not for children under the age of 5, unless they are in a sibling group and/or have some medical diagnosis that is costly to treat. Really, so Mexico in their wisdom would like to keep children in the orphanage until they are 5 years old, no wonder Mexico has so many socio-economic and politically violent issues. Yeah, I am pissed.

Door Closed.

To be Continued…..

© Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Yvonne B. Pérez and The Life and Confessions of an Older Mother with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.