Have I Told You .... Why I am Blogging?

I know weird, right?  Me, an introvert, incredibly private, a person who does not like to wear her emotions on her sleeve to be visible to the world, I guess stranger things have happened. Throughout the adoption process the fears I had were based on primarily two issues, Time and Age. My time, my age. I also realized it was going to take a great act of selflessness to have a baby, but it is no different with any parent regardless of age, all parents are selfless, okay most parents. There are three primary reasons I am blogging.

The first is to teach our daughter, Benecia, that regardless of the exhaustive life planning one makes, at the end, the rainbow is better than you can imagine when you are walking on the path to God, the Supreme One, Source, what ever he/she is to you. Even though I so desperately wanted a son, I can’t imagine being any happier than I am with a daughter. She needs to know this for there will always be jokes in my family about how much I wanted a son, secretly I think we all wanted a boy, today we are all happier with a girl. For example, my sister told me shortly before she married, many years ago, that she wanted three boys, I laughed, loudly, responding with a, “Are you kidding, God is going to only give you daughters and payback will be hell”.  She has two daughters and I have one, we are both tremendously blessed, and they do give her hell sometimes, as Beny will to us.

Secondly, because my daughter is adopted I want her to know that she was wanted and loved from the start and she is no different than any other member of the family. She is of me, she is of us, I birthed her emotionally, we experienced a gestation period, it may not have been physical but it certainly was emotional, intellectual and spiritual, in my opinion certainly more important than the physical. In my family we joke a lot, ok I joke a lot with my nieces of how much they look like me and are like me, I don’t want her to ever feel left out, she too looks like me in coloring and the shape of the eyes, she has a neck like her father’s – short, and his curly hair, and pretty legs like my sister. She is of us. The nature she gets from her birth family and the nurture she gets from us. We will never deny her birth family; she looks a great deal like her birth mother who is a beautiful young lady with a beautiful soul and wants to desperately to do the right thing. She has a set of incredible birth grandparents, maternal and paternal, that will be a source of joy to her when she is older, they are already a source of Love. We will be forever grateful to Beny’s maternal great-grandmother, who has become a part of our family, and we part of hers. There aren’t words enough to express my gratitude and respect for what she has accomplished in her life and for the love she extends to Beny daily.

Lastly, sharing the story of adoption is important, for its not always an easy path but nonetheless a rewarding one. Its not merely a story of adoption it is a story of desire and manifestation in the right time, it is a story of God hearing prayers. May God always hear our prayers.